There was this guy that I had been talking to for almost a year and I really fell for him. I love that boy! Unfortunately, we stopped talking in Sept. but I still have feelings for him. I figured he would come around eventually…I was wrong. I just found out he likes another girl and it tears me to pieces. I’m so heart broken. I really thought we connected…he even said, “I love you” once on accident, but I kind of ignored it because it was a bit too early for me. Over time, the words “I love you” gained meaning to them but I was too scared to say them since we weren’t dating. Although we weren’t dating, I still believe I fell in love with him. I was so scared to admit it because I had never fallen in love before. Now my worse nightmare has come true. I have to watch him possibly fall in love with someone else. I have to see someone take the place of where I should have been. Distance and communication issues were our downfall. I couldn’t change the distance between us, but I did my best to work on the communication issues. He just wasn’t putting in the effort. A few times, I felt like giving up on him but that was impossible. I never wanted to give up on him. I just wanted him to meet me halfway. During the summer 2012, we were both home for break and I couldn’t wait to see him! He got a job and started working overtime and late hours. I wanted to see him but due to his hectic work schedule, I knew he was tired and stressed. He had days off and never once did he try to see me. It hurt my feelings to know that I had waited all this time to see him and now that we were in the SAME city, he didn’t try to visit me. Maybe that’s when he started talking to the girl he is talking now. Maybe he was trying to let me go easily. After going the entire summer without seeing him, I returned back to school. I still had strong feelings for him. Over time, his texts became less frequent and he changed. I refuse to end a relationship without a reason or talking it out so we had a talk on Sept. 12, 2012 about how things were between us. He claimed he didn’t want the distance to affect me…however I was the one trying to make things work despite the distance. I didn’t mind the distance because my feelings allowed me to overlook that. He said he never wanted to lose me completely but since that day he hasn’t spoken to me. I’ve texted him once since then and the conversation did not last long. After that, I just figured I would leave him alone. We remained friends on all the social network sites but after finding out he has moved on, I deleted him from all of the social network sites. I don’t even think he has noticed…but this is how things have to be. I can’t be friends with someone I care that much about.
Dec. 26, 2012
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